School and Piccolo don't mix
by Emilia
Summary: This is part3 in my little series and I wrote it to terrify people with the fact that it's almost time for school to start. In THIS episode, we learn about the evil teacher trying to overpopulate the world. *sings* Put your right foot forward! put your ri


"We love to see you smile!" The commercial on Tv ended, leaving Piccolo to stare at the Tv in disgust.  
  
"What is this cra-" He started to yell when, suddenly, he was hit in the head with a plate.  
  
"Piccolo!!!!! No swearing in this house!!!" He turned to see Chichi behind him brandishing a stack of dishes.  
  
"But Goten's at school and Gohan's off acting like a geek somewhere! Who's gonna hear me?" Piccolo was staring to wish he hadn't agreed to come over today.  
  
"Goku will!" She declared, pointing over to Goku who had just burst in the door with Vegeta after a long day of beating the internal organs outa each other.  
  
"What? That's a bunch of cr*p! He doesn't care if I-"  
  
"AAAAAAAH!!!!! MY VIRGIN EARS!!!!!!!!" Goku clamped his hands over his ears and ran aronud screaming. "My entire world on innocence is shattered!! My virgin ears have been raped!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"  
  
"Now look what you've done!" yelled Chichi, throwing a bowl at Piccolo. "There there Goku..it's all right…"  
  
"But he s…said…" Goku burst into tears.  
  
"Oh get ahold of yourself Kakkarot! Quit acting like you kids!" Vegeta growled.  
  
"But my virgin ears!!!" Goku wailed.  
  
"Oh shut up!" Vegeta hauled off and kicked Goku in the butt as hard as he could. That shut Goku up. Suddenly, the phone rang.  
  
"I'll get it!" Chichi picked it up. "Hello? Uh huh… uh huuuuuuuh…yes Isee..okay yeah sure. Bye now!" She slammed the phone down. "Goku! Goten and Trunks are causing trouble at school. I need you and Vegeta to go down there and either staighten them out or being them home."  
  
"Okaay!" Goku grabbed Vegeta's arm and started to drag him off. Piccolo started to slink into the living room when-  
  
"Oh no you don't! You go too!" She held up a plate that said 'bang Piccolo's head here'.  
  
"Fine!" He growled and then he, Goku and Vegeta flew off to the school.  
  
  
  
"What seems to be the problem?" Goku asked Goten and Trunk's teacher, a middle-aged skinny lady who looked like a war victim.  
  
"Well, er we're having a teensy weensy problem with your son and Mr. Vegeta's. They seem to think that I'm plotting to take over the world by over population and get young innocent children pregnant at an early age." She gritted her teeth.  
  
"And why is that?"  
  
"Well, all I had them do was- oh come see for yourself!" She led them inside where there were a bunch of kids standing in a line except for Turnks and Goten who stood sulking by themselves. "Ready kids? Let's show our visitors what we've been learning!"  
  
"Oh boy!" Goku clapped his hands and sat down. Vegetadragged Goten and Trunks over ot sit with them and Piccolo tried to lean against the wall but ended up tripping over a giant plastic lion that said 'Reading can take you anywhere!'   
  
"How generic.." He muttered as the teacher pushed the play button on a tape recorder.  
  
"Ready boys and girls?" She said with false enthusiasm.  
  
"Yeeeeeees!"  
  
"Hee ee y bo ooys and girls! Reee eady for ssssome fuu uunn?" The ancient tape spat out. "Then lee ets get reea eeaaady to d da ance! 1 2 3 4!" Generic happy music started up. "Oooh put yer left foot forward! Put yer left foot out! DO the bunny hop! Hop! Hop! Hop! Put yer right foot forward! Put yer right foot out! Do the bunny hop! Hop! Hop! Hop!"  
  
"Oh no!!!!" Goku screamed, jumping up.  
  
"Stop the tape!!! Don't you fools know what you're doing?????" Vegeta threw the tape player against the wall, smashing it into ity bity pieces. "Don't you know what doing the Bunny dance can do to you?!?!?!?"  
  
"Huh?" Everyone looked shocked as Goten and Tunks gave everyone the I-told-you-so look.  
  
"You fools don't know what the bunny dance can do??? You're too young to be concieving babies!!!!"  
  
"Now Mr. Breifs… we were just-"  
  
"My name is not Mr. Briefs!!!!"  
  
"Oh well, the point of that dance is somply a physical activity for the children to enjoy and-"  
  
"But they're too young!!! Don't you see what could happen???" Goku pleaded.  
  
"But all I was trying to do was-"  
  
"You ARE trying to take over the world!!!!" Goku's eyes got big. "I'm disgusted with this school for letting criminal masterminds like you in here! Sic 'em Vegeta!"  
  
"With pleasure!" Vegeta turned to the confused teacher. "Trying to get my kid and his friend to have babies, eh? Well not anymore! Big Bang attack!" There was a, er big bang and there was no more teacher.  
  
"Where'd the teacher lady go?" The kids crowded around a pile of dust.  
  
"She's gone to the enxt dimension as a punishment for trying to get oyu kids to do something you're not ready for."  
  
"What's that?" They all crowded around Vegeta and Goku.  
  
"Gather around brats and I'll tell you all about the ballets and the bunnies!" Everyone listened as Vegeta began his explanation of reproduction.  
  
"Oooooh!" All the kids cried.  
  
"So THAT'S what that thumping noise is!" One boy said excitedly.  
  
"My dad knows all about the Bunny dance!" Trunks said proudly. Then the bell rang and everyone ran out because school was over.  
  
"Let's get out of here!" Vegeta stood up.  
  
As they were walking out, they all noticed that Piccolo had a huge smirk on his face. "What's so funny Mr. Piccolo?" asked Goten.  
  
"Heh. I've only gotten hit once today! This is great! I never knew a whole day could go by without me-" Bang! A school bus went out of control and ran Piccolo over. "Ooooooooowwwww!!!" cried a rather flat Piccolo.  
  
"Don't worry! I got the number of that bus that hit you!" (heh, I love that joke *_*) Goku said excitedly, flying off, then coming back with schoolbus #7. "Where do you want it?"  
  
"Hey put this bus down!" The driver yelled out the window.  
  
"Okay, sorry!" Goku dropped the bus, sending it crashing down on Piccolo's stomach before it drove off. "So what were you saying about today being one of your better days, Piccolo?" Piccolo got up and snatched a senzu bean from Goku.  
  
"Forget it! I've just discovered that I hate school!"  
  
"Oh well let's all go get soemthing ot eat before we go home!" Goku's eyes lit up as everyone walked to the nearest McDonalds.  
  
As they walked into the sunset, the instrumental version of "Just Communications" started to play.  
  
  
The End.  
  
Krillin: Um, Emilia?  
Emilia: Yeees Krillin-chan?  
Krillin: "Just Communications" is the theme from Gundam Wing, not DBZ!  
Emilia: So? It has a tight guitar in there! *pulls out her red DeArmond and plays the guitar part of Just Communications* See?  
Krillin: But it's from GUNDAM WING!!! This is a DBZ fic!!!  
Emilia: Nobody caaaaaares! And it's fuuunnnnn! Don't be a cry baby!  
Krillin: But I don't like Gundam Wing! Wufei and Trowa scare me!  
Emilia: Uh oh!  
Quatre: What did you say about my Trowa???  
Emilia: No! No Quatre! Go back into your cage! I'll give you a crumpet! No! Even better! I'll give you a crumpet AND I'll read you a 3x4/4x3 fic. Your faaaavoriiite, ne?  
Qautre: Yaaaaay!!!  
Krillin: How come you never read ME stories about me? Better yet- how come you never put Me in your DBZ fics??? I'm supposed to be your favorite pet!!!  
Emilia: Fine fine! I promise you'll be in the next DBZ fic I write! Now go do something constructive while I go read to Quatre.~  



End file.
